Vital Football

Latest Manchester City News

Having A Laugh At The Gooners Expense

Having A Laugh At The Gooners Expense

Google language translator

In the ninth of many, Vital Manchester City brings readers the 'Let The Banter Begin' series. In this episode, we look at our next opponents, Arsenal. To make the most of the atmosphere, ensure you're PC speakers are on.

This article is not intended to be-little the club or their fans in any shape or form - on the contrary, the whole idea is intended to be light-hearted.

Register On Vital Manchester City here.

Previous Let The Banter Begin articles:


Newcastle United


Chelsea (2)


Chelsea (1)

Aston Villa

Manchester United

How did you enjoy your holiday in Israel?'
Did you visit the Wailing Wall?'
'Yes - but I couldn't get anyway near it for the Arsenal supporters!'

Q: Why did God make Arsenal supporters smelly?
A: So blind people could laugh at them too!

Q: What do you call 100 Arsenal supporters at the bottom of a cliff?
A: A good start!

Did you hear about the Conservative MP who was found dead in an Arsenal strip?

The police had to dress him up in women's underwear in order to save his family from the embarrassment.

Q: Why do housewives love Arsenal?
A: Because they stay on top for ages and come second!

Q: Why do people take an instant dislike to Arsenal?
A: It saves time.

Q: Why do Arsenal fans whistle on the toilet?
A: So they know which end to wipe.

A woman buys a car in London. On her way home she notices that only one radio station works. She immediately turns the car around and heads back to the dealer.

Oi,' she says, 'the bleedin' radio in this motor doesn't work! It only receives one station!'

The dealer replies, 'It's voice activated. You tell it want kind of music you want to listen to, and it automatically changes.'

This satisfies the woman, who immediately gets back into the car and drives for home. On the way, she says, 'Classical...'

The car radio automatically switches to classical music.

He then says, 'rock and roll...'

The car radio automatically switches to a Rolling Stones tune.

Again, she speaks to the car radio...

Country Music...'

The car radio automatically switches to a Garth Brooks song.

Light then, a guy in a Jag pulls in front of her and cuts her off...

Wanker!!!!' she screams.

The car radio automatically switches to an Arse match on Capital 'Gooner' Gold.

Q: Why do Arsenal men like smart women?
A: Opposites attract.

Q: What do you say to an Arsenal fan with a job?
A: 'Can I have a Big Mac!'

Q: How do you make an Arsenal fan's eyes light up?
A: Shine a torch in his ears.

Q: What do you call the Arsenal team standing ear to ear?
A: A wind tunnel.

Q: What do you call a fly inside an Arsenal fans head?
A: A Space Invader.

Click here to join in the debate on the club forum.

Date:Thursday November 20 2008
Time: 5:49PM


Come on now most of those jokes are pretty old, I think most of them were around in 1976, the last time Citeh won a trophy.
Ashburton Gooner
20/11/2008 19:17:00
LOL AG! Got a quick question, W. Gallas has indicated there might be trouble at the Arsenal mill. Is there a problem in the dressing room?
Johnny Baguette
20/11/2008 19:20:00
Pretty one-dimensional humour there hehehe..
21/11/2008 06:17:00
we both need something to laugh about at the moment !!!!
21/11/2008 10:08:00
Page 1/1
  1. 1

Login to post a comment

Recent Manchester City Articles

Podcast: FFL Halloween Special & City ClubCall

The (unofficial) fantasy Premier League podcast brings listeners their Halloween special podcast (episode 11). Are you brave enough to listen to this week's scary show?

(Video) Joe Hart Isn't Having Much Luck At Torino

It's been a couple of months since Joe Hart left Manchester City and I guess, similar to Claudio Bravo, the England number one keeper is trying to find his feet whilst..

Highlights: Manchester United 1-0 Manchester City

Manchester United set up an EFL Cup quarter-final tie at home to West Ham United after a 1-0 derby win over Manchester City at Old Trafford last night.

Video Debrief: Manchester United Fans Have Their Say

Manchester United won the derby at Old Trafford last night but what did you think of the match? Here is what United supporters had to say.

Archived VMC Articles

VMC articles from

Site Journalists

Tudor (VMC Editor)
Editor email
Johnny Baguette
no email
no email
no email

Current Poll (see more polls)

City's performance, out of five against Manchester United?
Suggested By: Tudor
ScoopDragon Premier League Network Sites

League Table

# Team P W D L Pts. GD
1 Man City 9 6 2 1 20 11
2 Arsenal 9 6 2 1 20 10
3 Liverpool 9 6 2 1 20 9
4 Chelsea 9 6 1 2 19 10
5 Spurs 9 5 4 0 19 9
6 Everton 9 4 3 2 15 5
7 Man Utd 9 4 2 3 14 1
8 Southampton 9 3 4 2 13 3
9 Watford 9 3 3 3 12 0
10 AFC Bournemouth 9 3 3 3 12 0
11 Crystal Palace 9 3 2 4 11 0
12 Leicester City 9 3 2 4 11 -4
13 WBA 9 2 4 3 10 0
14 Burnley 9 3 1 5 10 -5
15 West Ham 9 3 1 5 10 -7
16 Stoke 9 2 3 4 9 -7
17 Middlesbrough 9 1 4 4 7 -4
18 Hull City 9 2 1 6 7 -14
19 Swansea 9 1 2 6 5 -7
20 Sunderland 9 0 2 7 2 -10
The Vital Football Members League
Latest F1 News
Latest Vital Boxing News
Vital Football Comment

Recent Manchester City Results (view all)

Manchester City Fixtures (view all)

Oct 29 2016 3:00PM : West Bromwich Albion (a)
Barclays Premier League
Nov 5 2016 3:00PM : Middlesbrough (H)
Barclays Premier League
Nov 19 2016 3:00PM : Crystal Palace (a)
Barclays Premier League
Nov 26 2016 12:30PM : Burnley (a)
Barclays Premier League
Dec 3 2016 3:00PM : Chelsea (H)
Barclays Premier League
Dec 10 2016 3:00PM : Leicester City (a)
Barclays Premier League

Vital Members League Table

1.Johnny Baguette400
2.Buzz Lightyear333
5.Colin Is The King192
Write for Vital Football