Vital Football

Latest Manchester City News

Having A Laugh At The Gooners Expense

Having A Laugh At The Gooners Expense

Google language translator


In the ninth of many, Vital Manchester City brings readers the 'Let The Banter Begin' series. In this episode, we look at our next opponents, Arsenal. To make the most of the atmosphere, ensure you're PC speakers are on.

This article is not intended to be-little the club or their fans in any shape or form - on the contrary, the whole idea is intended to be light-hearted.



Register On Vital Manchester City here.

Previous Let The Banter Begin articles:

Tottenham

Newcastle United

Liverpool

Chelsea (2)

Celtic

Chelsea (1)

Aston Villa

Manchester United

How did you enjoy your holiday in Israel?'
'Smashing!''
Did you visit the Wailing Wall?'
'Yes - but I couldn't get anyway near it for the Arsenal supporters!'


Q: Why did God make Arsenal supporters smelly?
A: So blind people could laugh at them too!

Q: What do you call 100 Arsenal supporters at the bottom of a cliff?
A: A good start!


Did you hear about the Conservative MP who was found dead in an Arsenal strip?

The police had to dress him up in women's underwear in order to save his family from the embarrassment.

Q: Why do housewives love Arsenal?
A: Because they stay on top for ages and come second!


Q: Why do people take an instant dislike to Arsenal?
A: It saves time.

Q: Why do Arsenal fans whistle on the toilet?
A: So they know which end to wipe.


A woman buys a car in London. On her way home she notices that only one radio station works. She immediately turns the car around and heads back to the dealer.

Oi,' she says, 'the bleedin' radio in this motor doesn't work! It only receives one station!'

The dealer replies, 'It's voice activated. You tell it want kind of music you want to listen to, and it automatically changes.'

This satisfies the woman, who immediately gets back into the car and drives for home. On the way, she says, 'Classical...'

The car radio automatically switches to classical music.

He then says, 'rock and roll...'

The car radio automatically switches to a Rolling Stones tune.

Again, she speaks to the car radio...

Country Music...'

The car radio automatically switches to a Garth Brooks song.

Light then, a guy in a Jag pulls in front of her and cuts her off...

Wanker!!!!' she screams.

The car radio automatically switches to an Arse match on Capital 'Gooner' Gold.

Q: Why do Arsenal men like smart women?
A: Opposites attract.


Q: What do you say to an Arsenal fan with a job?
A: 'Can I have a Big Mac!'

Q: How do you make an Arsenal fan's eyes light up?
A: Shine a torch in his ears.


Q: What do you call the Arsenal team standing ear to ear?
A: A wind tunnel.

Q: What do you call a fly inside an Arsenal fans head?
A: A Space Invader.




Click here to join in the debate on the club forum.

Writer:Tudor
Date:Thursday November 20 2008
Time: 5:49PM

Comments

0
Come on now most of those jokes are pretty old, I think most of them were around in 1976, the last time Citeh won a trophy.
Ashburton Gooner
20/11/2008 19:17:00
0
LOL AG! Got a quick question, W. Gallas has indicated there might be trouble at the Arsenal mill. Is there a problem in the dressing room?
Johnny Baguette
20/11/2008 19:20:00
0
Pretty one-dimensional humour there hehehe..
GoonerLou
21/11/2008 06:17:00
0
we both need something to laugh about at the moment !!!!
lincolnblue
21/11/2008 10:08:00
Page 1/1
  1. 1

Login to post a comment

Recent Manchester City Articles

UCL Preview: Man City v AS Monaco

From the form team in the Championship to the form team in the French Ligue 1 as City return to Champions League action on Tuesday evening when they welcome Leonardo Jardim's..

(BBC Audio) 'Arsenal Fan TV Is Like Jeremy Kyle'

Alex Hylton says the Manchester City fan channel produces very different content to that of Arsenal Fan TV.

Huddersfield Town 0 Manchester City 0 - Johnny On The Spot

The recent phase of some of City's most exhilarating football of the season came to a close in Yorkshire with an ecky-thump this weekend...

The Ped Report Huddersfield Town 0-0 City

Another Match for the Blues

Archived VMC Articles

VMC articles from

Site Journalists

Tudor (VMC Editor)
Editor email
Profile
Johnny Baguette
no email
Profile
Pedmachine
no email
Profile
Skoorb
no email
Profile

Current Poll (see more polls)

How many goals, if any will City score against Monaco?
Suggested By: Tudor
Five or more12%
Four0%
Three11%
Two33%
One11%
City won't score33%
ScoopDragon Premier League Network Sites

League Table

# Team P W D L Pts. GD
1 Chelsea 25 19 3 3 60 34
2 Man City 25 16 4 5 52 22
3 Spurs 25 14 8 3 50 28
4 Arsenal 25 15 5 5 50 26
5 Liverpool 25 14 7 4 49 24
6 Man Utd 25 13 9 3 48 17
7 Everton 25 11 8 6 41 13
8 WBA 25 10 7 8 37 3
9 Stoke 25 8 8 9 32 -6
10 West Ham 25 9 5 11 32 -9
11 Southampton 25 8 6 11 30 -3
12 Burnley 25 9 3 13 30 -9
13 Watford 25 8 6 11 30 -13
14 AFC Bournemouth 25 7 5 13 26 -14
15 Swansea 25 7 3 15 24 -23
16 Middlesbrough 25 4 10 11 22 -8
17 Leicester City 25 5 6 14 21 -19
18 Hull City 25 5 5 15 20 -27
19 Crystal Palace 25 5 4 16 19 -14
20 Sunderland 25 5 4 16 19 -22
Vital Football Comment
Latest F1 News
Latest Vital Boxing News
Write for Vital Football

Recent Manchester City Results (view all)

Manchester City Fixtures (view all)

Feb 26 2017 2:15PM : Manchester United (H)
Barclays Premier League
Mar 5 2017 4:00PM : Sunderland (a)
Barclays Premier League
Mar 11 2017 12:30PM : Stoke City (H)
Barclays Premier League
Mar 19 2017 4:30PM : Liverpool (H)
Barclays Premier League
Apr 1 2017 3:00PM : Arsenal (a)
Barclays Premier League
Apr 5 2017 7:45PM : Chelsea (a)
Barclays Premier League

Vital Members League Table

RankNamePoints
1.Buzz Lightyear446
2.Skoorb237
3.Johnny Baguette137
4.Rising109
5.Bluedub108
6.Tudor86
7.johnkelv86
8.Colin Is The King68
9.citizhun65
10.kennyclementstache45
The Vital Football Members League