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Swamp Aid

The Red Devil himself, FERGIE SIGN HIM UP sent us the following.

I saw this article in this morning's edition of the Times and thought it might interest some on this site.

Sir Bob Boomtown 78 The Square Kensington SW1 wrote...

Dear people of Britain. In these times of great hardship when almost everyone is feeling the pinch I find it extremely difficult to dust of the old begging bowl and once again ask you all to dig deep. But alas, even in this time of financial difficulty for all, there is a cause that I am sure will have you opening your wallet without hesitation. I am of course referring to the current plight of the band wagon tribe who face the unthinkable and ever more likely situation of being evicted from their natural habitat and home of many years, 'The Swamp.'

Now the Swamp has been a place of fun and laughter for many a year, an oasis in an otherwise bleak and dismal landscape that has attracted literally millions of tourists over the years. But now that has all changed and believe me it's not for the best.

It all started a few years ago, and as I said previously the Swamp was once a place of milk and honey were nothing ever went wrong. But then owner, the son of a retired butcher felt he was getting too old to look after his land and decided to sell. The butchers son had hardly finished hammering the for sale sign above his door when his telephone rang. In a matter of weeks the butcher's son had sold his Swamp to an evil American corporation that went by the name of GLOBOTWAT INC. The said company (if you didn't know) was headed by the most evil man in the history of the world, Malcolm Blazerburger.

Now Blazerburger was not happy with owning the Swamp. He also wanted to strip it of all its natural assets and charge the band-waggoner sky high rent to stay on his land. He even taxed them for times they were not even at the Swamp and amazingly they did nothing. Ironically, it came to pass that GLOBOTWAT INC in fact had no money of their own and after they had stripped the Swamp of all its wealth they left never to be seen again.

Now this leaves us in the current situation we presently find ourselves. I have already got things under way by gathering the cream of Britain's musical talent to record a charity C.D 'Swamp Aid' and 'Do They Know Its Fergie Time', which should be available for download early next month.

So once again I implore you, do not sit back and leave it to others. Once the Swamp has gone it's gone for good.

Yours in desperation

Sir Bob Boomtown

The Swamp



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The journalist

Writer: Tudor Mail feedback, articles or suggestions

Date:Thursday January 14 2010

Time: 9:29PM

Your Comments (oldest first)

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Sir Bob Boomtown ? this sounds like bob geldoff(boomtown rats) lol
bluemooner_mcfc
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14/01/2010 21:37:00

I just found 7p down the back of my settee they can have. Every little bit helps right?
fifthcolumnblue
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14/01/2010 21:37:00

Listened to it - it's crap
BlueWolfie
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14/01/2010 21:39:00

Send them to the Poorhouse I say, give 'em a good birching too whilst you're at it, give 'em some moral fibre. Although not my Mum. Or my Aunties and Uncles that support the Scum. Or 'er indoors. Definitely the rest of them 'tho.
It's Grim Oop North
Report Abuse
14/01/2010 22:45:00

"Tell me why I don't like ra-ags."
Johnny Baguette
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15/01/2010 05:34:00

 

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