Vuvuzela Coming To A Stadium Near You

Got my vuvuzela! I think they're brilliant... as long as you only use them at appropriate times (goals, teams coming out etc) They're no worse than air horns etc which are allows at stadiums Allow them into the EPL!

they are great, just been on holiday, loved walking past tvs, hearing the constant buzz of the crowd. Never a dull moment. I would love to hear coms in a constant buzz, rather than silence, which is often the case.

The vuvuzela is a bit like marmite. You either love it or hate it.

They can blow my horn if they think I'm putting up with that racket for 90 minutes every week.

When we were boys, we used to do Saturday morning work and shopping for our grandmother and great aunt, who lived together after their husbands had left the planet. Our reward for doing this constituted our entire weekly pocket money. We used to get sixpence to start with, which graduated to a shilling as we approached senior school age. A fortune. At the local newsagents, at the end of the road, they used to sell plastic and paper trumpets for about threepence. We bought them because they made a hell of a racket. Three of us blowing them at once must have sounded something like a pre-Portsmouth Sinfonia howl coming down the street on our return with the shopping. We called them 'trashy trumpets', because by the middle of the afternoon they were soggy in the paper parts and just fell to pieces. By that time we'd been told off about ten times, and I can remember one time when one was taken off me and crunched underfoot. Perhaps this is what should happen to vuvuzelas as they enter the ground. Straight under a big foot and into a giant re-cycling bin. It's possibly a generational thing. Kids want to make noise, whereas the rest of us would rather enjoy the true dynamic of what is after all a visit to the theatre. If you can't hear the oos and ahs of the crowd, and the only dynamic left is the kid's loud vuvuzela monotone, then half the narrative is missing. As always, the kids are pressing hard to be heard. And they will be. I have another sense. I can smell a visit from Health and Safety just now coming over the horizon. Trashy trumpets wouldn't even have made it out of the factory if Health and Safety had been involved. What's the world coming to? (As they used to say). Hopefully not vuvuzelas say I. My tinitus is bad enough already. When you've been surrounded by rock and roll for a decade or two, tinitus becomes an occupational hazard. What we're talking about here is a recreational hazard. You gotta smile though. Just as long as you can stand a couple of hundred yards away from the din. I got used to them at the World Cup, because I was holding the remote a lot of the time. They became a cultural feature with no mean effect. They WILL make us remember them. A true paradox perhaps. But eventually, even if it's with some crazy sense of joy, you have to think that vuvuzelas are meant to alienate, and on that account, they do a fantastic job.

These instruments are a damned nuisance and have ruined my enjoyment of the World Cup more than England's performances. I have watched most matches on "mute" and the one advantage of that is that you don't have to listen to the drivel given out by Clive Mr Manchester United Tyldesley. Do you know if he was commentating on a non-league match he would find a way to link it to Rooney & Ferndinand. I was at a meeting yesterday where these things were discussed and their are issues surrounding the amount of noise that they emit and the ongoing dangers of individuals effectively suing Clubs in respect of hearing deficiencies caused by them. I think they blast out 125 decibels. I know for certain that several Clubs are to include them on the prohibited items list.

Thanks for the update Roy. You certainly are a busy man and at the same time you seem to be enjoying it as well. You have my email address and when your ready (no rush) feel free to send me something, including any potential tour dates etc and we'll add that to the article at the same time.