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'If It's Football, It's Vital'

Nothing Could Be Further From The Truth


They say the British are famous for many things; posh accents, bad weather, great football, getting smashed in Ibiza, failing at the World Cup and writing a letter when angry.

Dear Vital Manchester City readers,

Today, I encountered a football match - not just any football match though - it was the wonderful Manchester City Football Club versus Blackburn Rovers Rugby League Club however. I did not specifically like what I saw before me.

Because before me was a very tall man who did not duck his head. That is my first complaint. Surely all the tall people should be made to sit at the back of the stadium so us small people can enjoy the football match. Tall man. But, back to the football game.

First of all I have a few congratulations to hand out.

* I would like to congratulate Blackburn Rovers for hitting row z as many times as possible.

* I would like to congratulate Johnny Wilkinson for his new role as head coach at Blackburn Rovers.

* I would like to congratulate Mark Clattenburg as he was the most vocal of all the Blackburn fans in the stadium today.

* I would like to congratulate Jo today as he was the best spectator of the game today.

* And, I would like to thanks Sam Allardyce for the most entertaining game of rugby I have ever watched. You could most probably have the most exciting game of dot to dot on Adam Johnson's leg from the studs that were implanted into them.

Congrats out of the way, I must now rant...

We didn't play very well at all to say the least. We kept passing a little heavy and some players were a little off, but we all have those days and I can't complain. You get used to it being sky blue...and overall we were the better side.

We came out the traps to be followed by Blackburn who found a peculiar goal after uncharacteristic defensive confusion on our behalf. And then it was on. The rest of the match was spent with Mark Clattenburg's whistle for every breath of fresh air on a Blackburn players neck hair, (and silence whenever City players were knocked into next week - maybe that's bias on my behalf), chances, runs, City attacks, and a chorus of 'you're not fit to referee.'

Adam Johnson had a great game once more as his feet sent the defence mad however the rest of the team weren't really on the ball. Tevez was everywhere but never quite got that last bit that he needed, Milner was a bit hit and miss, Wright Phillips was looking ace one minute and then would fail. Lescott's pace was enough to rival my pet snail who died a few years ago (we are a poor family - couldn't afford a dog or fish), and Vieira was showing us all why he is such a slick passer - because if he holds on the ball for too long he may have to move, consequently running out of breath from his slow speed. Was not the best. By the way, I like to exaggerate.

The refereeing I shall not go into...oh what the hell - it's bad to bottle things up.

The refereeing was the worst I've seen in a long time, (god I've missed the season) as Mr Clattenburg seemed to have lost the plot. That reminds me that I must email him later as I think I've just found his marbles (I should not and will not take up the career choice of comedian) and I've never found myself so frustrated in...in...a week since we played Sunderland, but that's beside the point! In fact, I'm so frustrated its only now on my second read through of this article that I have decided to delete all the swear words, name calling and insults to his mother!

Barry livened it up, to be followed by another livening up from Silva, after a Vieira tap in equalised, so it was looking good - and we may just nick it!

The roars of 'Who are ya?' from both sets of supporters were ringing around and cries of 'oooh' and ahh' and 'it's a goal!!' followed by 'ahh, it's not' around the stadium though as it reached the final minutes everybody seemed dismal. It looked like it wasn't our day.

As you may have just read I said 'it wasn't our day', if you don't believe me I give you permission to scroll back up and read it...see I told you, however on almost the very last minute I believed it was, as did 'Big Pete' next to me, 'Small Dave' behind, and all the other supporters in the stadium!

Tevez was free from an overhead chip and all he had to do was tap it in...oh there's the keeper, oh and a few others...ahh...oooh...ahh...oooh...(did I mention I sit next to a chimpanzee) he somehow managed to keep it and had Jo to pass to on his left who would tuck it home, win it, be carried away, become a hero, open his new range of clothing, live forever being fed grapes from three naked hot blonds. Jobs a gooden - lets go home - X Factor's on soon.

He passed it and...Jo shoots...its blocked. It's blocked. It's blocked. I thought I'd drill that into your head by saying it a few times. Hands on heads, heads in hands, chairs slammed shut and children hit by parents across the head from frustration.

Game over and the Blackburn fans celebrated like they had just won World War 3. - Ahh, the days of celebrating draws ay.

We have positives though, cheer up, and put X Factor on with a pint.

And, there's always next week. Isn't it fun to be Blue?

Yours sincerely, Harry Newton...Bundo, over and out.






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The journalist

Writer: Bundo Mail feedback, articles or suggestions

Date:Saturday September 11 2010

Time: 8:37PM

Your Comments

Clattenburg likes to be the centre of attention - and he was! We should not use him as an excuse for not winning this game - we should have stuck more than one of our 10 shots on target in the back of their net, and Jo Hart will be featuring in a few football bloopers videos for that one! However, the ref was utterly atrocious today, and although we bore the brunt of the dodgy decisions Blackburn got a few weird ones given against them too. However, the fact remains that teams like Blackburn do take the "contact sport" element of the game to heart, and when a ref allows such tactics it ruins the game as a spectacle. I guess City will have to get used to such rough house tactics, as they disrupt the game and when we don't flow, we don't play well. Just hope this isn't a sign of things to come from refs, as subbconciously they must pick up on the hatred and general fear of Man City and think to themselves "they'll get no favours from me today!" Because Mr Clattenburg certainly didn't look much of a City fan today - or a fan of the beautiful game for that matter!
fifthcolumnblue
Chin up, lads, happens to the best of us. :P
DubaiSpur
Christ...Give a team credit, talk about sour grapes. It cant be all the referee's fault, He cant score for you!! Blackburn are a physical side but thats how they compete against the higher clubs in the table because they cant match the football played, surely you can understand that. This style of play has been going on for many years now so why all of a sudden get annoyed about it...Fair play to blackburn and good point.
P.Avfc
Cheers Dubai! (I wasn't being fascetious on yourr board BTW :P)
fifthcolumnblue
Obviously - we didnt do enough or those points will be ours but the referee or blackburns ability to knock you into next week and get away with it doesnt exactly help the situation. All credit to blackburn - if you can get away with it - time waste and kick all you can i guess. Bring on thursday ;)
Bundo
Neither was I, fifth. ;)
DubaiSpur
LOL great read Bundo :D We threw everything at Blackburn today but it just wasnt to be. Bring on Thursday!
eighthsin
we tried our best to break them down and couldn't find a way, that's life, don't just blame the referee, there'll be easier days i'm sure.
arthur7171
if the tactics work then why not? city are a fantastic team, to try and play them at their own game would be folly.
LHrover
I <3 the pic
Avfc94 we do
Ref was poor - but not his fault that we couldn't hit a barn door. I blame the players for a slow first half and Mancini for having his tactics wrong against a very ordinary Blackburn side who came to Eastlands with nothing more than "draw" written into their heads.
potwash
You can blame the ref or make excuses about the style of football Blackburn play,but eh int it their purpose to stop us scoring.The problem was our own inability to score and in a nut shell that's what you have to do to win football matches.
Spud 1
Sure you city fans had to expect that Blackburn would play the way they would, they do it every game, it is there style and sadly it works for them. This is what the "average" teams need to do to stay in the premier league and if it works you cant fault them for doing it again. Also, there is nothing wrong with celebrating a draw, as a matter of fact Im celebrating a draw right now :)
Rob-EFC
I watched you get that draw ROB and it chuffed me up no end mate. As for City, our first half was hopeless and a couple of players (using the term loosely) let us down, but onwards we go. Good work Bundo, enjoyed reading it.
Oziman
A weird day. Fantastic to see the rags tuned by their own medicine in an injury time double header. Weirdo Clattenburg is another matter. I reckon he fancies himself. What's that cockatoo hairstyle all about, then?
Johnny Baguette
Cannot believe Johnson's penalty shout was not on Match of the Day unless I went into a temporary coma. It was a deadset penalty and not even a glimpse of it on MOTD, who did their very best to make it seem like Blackburn had as many chances as us. Unbelievable, mind-blowing even.
StuMCFC
Stu was just on goals on sunday if you wanted to no...And it was a penalty.
P.Avfc
As a true city fan I can honestly say I read the first 2 paragraphs of this article and gave up. Pathetic journalism depicting truly one sided thoughts.
hallalex
Each to their own hallalex, it's all a matter of opinions - feel free to come down to the forums and tell us why you feel this way, promise no-one will shoot you down, as we welcome diversity of opinion on VMC.
fifthcolumnblue
 

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